I’ve always had a strong need for quiet. I am not one of those people who can happily read or work while music plays or kids bellow. My focus shifts from the task at hand to the music to the bellow to the task at hand to the music… I am what teachers called ‘easily distracted’. Noise smuggles away my concentration and steals my calm.
Mothers often find it hard to find the quiet and I struggled for many, many years to find mine. Now, though, I find myself nourished by quiet each day. At home when the kids are at school and I’m busy at work, the house is entirely calm and soft. The buzzing of the fish tank, the murmur of the fridge, the flitter of birds outside my window. My fingers clatter endlessly across the keyboard, the words loud and present in my head.
When school breaks, the kids fall into the quiet with a bellyflop, breathless with news and their walk home. They leave a scar across the calm that grows wider and wider until it never was. Busyness and chatter and all the doing returns, the softness of the day being greedily swallowed by eager voices.
I’ve learned to let the quiet go and savour the cacophony of my little people, busy growing. I let the quiet fade back into tomorrow and allow the whirlwind of family life to swirl into its place. The trick is to acknowledge the quiet in the first place. Value it, breathe it in with relish, so it fills you right up and leaves you eager to hear the noise.
Do you like quiet? Do you have quiet in your day?
Corinne says
I am a quiet person on a number of levels. I’m often described as quiet, or too quiet.
I know what you mean though. I’m not easily distracted by noise, having a father who was a jazz musician I often fell asleep to a saxophone blaring away. Although, I do savour the quiet now. In the evenings when quiet falls on the house. In the middle of the day when it’s just me tapping on the keyboard and the sound of the birds outside.
Maxabella says
I’m generally not a quiet person by any stretch of the imagination. Perhaps that’s why I seek it out so hungrily. Your dad sounds cool. The sax is an instrument I could listen to all day. x
Collette Beck says
I am totally in need of quiet. And alone time. I never considered myself an introvert because I love people and parties and get togethers, but as I’ve got older I realise I need to be alone in a quiet place for a time, in order to love those fun times. Sharing a house with growing kids, those quiet times need to be savoured.
Maxabella says
That’s me to a tee, Collette. x
Sandra Kelly says
This is such a lovely post. I’m easily distracted too. I loooove quiet. My mum often walks into my house and says “Who died – it’s so bloody quiet in here”. Yeah, doesn’t know how to get to the point my Mum *coughs. After the swirl and whirlwind of four kids I can tell you quiet is nice – but I do miss the sound of their voices – when they kept it to a dull roar that is. Beautiful words Bron. X
Maxabella says
Thanks Sandra. I think I will miss the roar one day too, but not today!!! x
Kit@lifethroughthehaze says
I don’t cope with the normal household noises very well. Even less in recent times though I suspect that has far more to do with my state of mind than anything else. When it is just me at home I usually have something on softly in the background. It can sometimes be the tv or a cd just something to keep the noise in my head at a minimum.
I am learning to cope with the quiet disappearing but it is taking me a while. I will try to savour the moments and remember that one day there will only be the quiet and I will miss the energy and the noise.
Maxabella says
This is what I remind myself of too. And it’s funny, but my head is ridiculously loud but I’ve always tried to listen, rather than drown it out. We are all different. x
Claire says
This is exactly how I feel! Savouring the peace at home today as my girls break up for the holidays this afternoon 🙂
Maxabella says
Ah, enjoy the solitude! Don’t you just CRAVE it in the holidays!?!?
Edie says
Loved that post! I love quiet too even though I’m a big mouth yelly person! I do love the quiet too xx
Maxabella says
I am a big-mouth yelly person too, Edie. Ridiculously loud. 🙂 x
Robyna | the Mummy & The Minx says
I always think that my mind makes so much of it’s own noise, that exterior noise should be kept to a minimum. I do like a good song while I’m doing mundane things like housework though.
Maxabella says
I do listen to music a lot, just not when I’m working. I like it when I’m cooking, doing housework, or chatting with a glass of wine!
Helen K says
I definitely need quiet, and I struggle without it. This past year has been tough in terms of finding that, and I’ve recently realised why. My team of four has been shuffled at work again, and I’ve been moved back into a building with very few people, all who have work that requires concentration (like ours). So there is limited noise. It is such a relief – we were plonked in the middle of about 60 others who were phone based / responding to enquiries on the spot – talking over the top of us in our low level cubicles (and drawing us into every conversation, as we were developing the strategies and policies for them) and it was a nightmare. It is taking me a little time to readjust, but I am appreciating it so much more (as I am, still, with the Thursdays at home) x
Maxabella says
Ah, the burden of the open plan office! EEEEeeeek! Thank goodness you are back in a quiet environment. I just can’t do it anymore at all. x
Clare says
Yes, I like the quiet, it calms me more than I think sometimes.
I cannot read or write with music or the radio on, I have to have quiet.
Lovely photo too x
Maxabella says
Same for me. We listen to a lot of music and I don’t mind reading while it plays, but never working. I just can’t concentrate. x
Emily @ Have A Laugh On Me says
Right now I have quiet, all 3 are away and all I can hear the hum of my printer, the clacking of my keyboard as I furiously work to get work and a few annoying crows. And I agree about the embracing, there’s no point in trying to expect calm once kids are home from school, you only end up cranky! xx
Maxabella says
You do! I know I do! It’s learning to enjoy it while it’s there, but let it go when it’s not. No point craving the opposite of what’s in front of us. x
JF Gibson says
Motherhood as certainly taught me to relish the quiet. I used to not be able to think without some music or background nosie. Now I love nothing more than sitting down at the computer when the kids are at school, with just the tinkering of the keys, the ticking of the clock and the whistles of the birds outside my window for company.
Maxabella says
We’ve got the same soundtrack, Jodi. Minus the clock. I cannot stand ticking clocks. Ever. x
Carolyn says
Yes, I am a quiet lover! Pre-kids, I always liked a bit of music happening but after the noise of toddlers I have savoured the quiet and even though those toddler days ar long gone, I still appreciate and need quiet space.that has been made clear to me in recent years as we have had exchange students, hubby taking breaks between jobs ( and then sometimes deciding to work from home!), and older kids who are now ‘in’ more often with uni timetables and spares at school. We are not noisy people, but I miss that quiet that was there on a platter when they were at school.
Maxabella says
I’m definitely savouring it! I was like you: loved the bustle and busyness of noise before the kids. I used to study in the pub! But now the kids are enough and other times are for quiet (or music). x
Julie says
My partner always has to have noise around him. Works with loud music on. When I am not home he will even have a nap with lud music (and wonders why our 4 year old has not gone to sleep). Me I like the softness of nothing. The nights he works I will sew or read with no noise other than the hum of the neighborhood.
Maxabella says
Is it frustrating to be surrounded by the music all the time, Julie?
Helen K says
Julie – your husband sounds like he’s the same as mine – except more often that not, the sounds are sports radio channels (talking about sport, calling the game, etc). Sometimes music, but more often, radio or TV, and always on. Moving room to room and adding another radio (so we have different things going on throughout the house). Thank goodness he is (slowly) adapting to wearing headphones with his phone instead (and that’s also how he goes to sleep. The two of us at night look like opposites – I’m more visual, and sit there with my book (or iphone), reading (I can’t quite do podcasts except in the car or walking / running (a little bit) – while he is listening (to TV, to radio, to ipad or phone) – but with earphones. At least we (kind of) both get what we need.
Mel Roworth says
I love quiet! I don’t get enough of it but I know it will come with time, as it has for you.
Katie M Little says
Ahhhh! Yes I love quiet and I can’t write without silence which is totally and utterly impossible in our house, unless… I get up at 5am and sneak downstairs to get a cup of tea and my laptop but the dogs start flapping and my son Tom wakes at a pin drop and starts talking and it’s all over red rover!
Lauren says
While I wouldn’t describe myself as a quiet person, I absolutely cherish quiet when I find it. Quiet is a part of the balancing act that keeps me sane
Jules @ toddlers plus teens says
I Love this post Bron ! It is the perfect post for me today as Hubby stretches out my routine with a large trip to the shops . I try not to food shop on saturdays as my week is already loaded with a very noisy and full on work day . X
Amy @ HandbagMafia says
I love the quiet. And being alone. It flies by and before I know it, is time for the school run or to pick up the little from day care. Lovely piece, Bron.
Agent Spitback says
I think I have forgotten what “quiet” sounds like or means anymore. I am surrounded by noise, from the time I wake up, go to work, back home again. I remember a time when I loved the solitude and the tranquility that came with it. Usually at the beach, with a good book, or a walk in the park….best times for ideas to emerge. But I think I have learnt to adapt to the noise in my environment but I do admit I do sometimes miss the sound of my own thoughts.
Rachel says
Yes, I’m a quiet sort of person too. I’ve worked in an open plan office for the last 5 or 6 years, and it’s only since I’ve been working for myself from home I’ve realised how much I achieve when there’s no noise close by. The holidays are a bit of a challenge, but with teenagers they all tend to stick to their own spaces anyway. Thanks!
Seana says
Love working at home for the peace and quiet. My hubby and big boys all listen to music whilst they work or study, I just can’t bear to. Do love especially a potter around the kitchen alone.