How I unspoiled my kids

Mary's House

I shared an article on my Facebook page a couple of weeks ago, that was shared again and again. There is a lot about the article that I don't agree with (the headline, for one thing), but there was a lot in there that really resonated with me. I am hyper-aware of how it is all-too easy to spoil our kids these days. In many, many ways, my kids ...

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The brick wall of parenting (aka ‘fixing myself’)

The brick wall of parenting

Years ago I made a couple of appointments for myself with the lovely psychologist who was treating Max's anxiety. This was a source of great amusement for a few of my friends, but the fact is that I knew that the person who could have the most profound impact on how Max dealt with his fears - apart from Max himself, of course - was me. Lately ...

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When parenting feels too hard

When parenting feels too hard

I'm not loving being a mum right now. It's hard to say that 'out loud', but there it is. Lately I feel like I'm carrying Sisyphus on my back as I go through the parenting motions. Up we push the rock, down the rock goes. Up we push the rock, down the spirits go. I've been here before. We've all been here before. Parenting has never been and will ...

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Parenting by heart | Re-entry

The end of holidays is a bittersweet time for me. Mainly because I know it sums up all of parenting for me and it makes me sad that I think this way: so very hard to let them go, so very hard to be with them constantly. I have never been that mum who can abandon herself to childhood. I have fought to stay present from the moment my bairns were ...

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Parenting by heart | That one thing you didn’t do

My Max often pulls a tummy-ache slash sore-throat slash foot-hurts kind of moment when it's time for school. Usually some body part or another requires attention right as the bell rings. This is a good day.I'm used to his shennannygoating and have an army of deflections trained to give their lives if necessary. Deflection soliders include the Magic ...

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Parenting by heart | A garage sale happened in my garage

We had ourselves a garage sale last weekend. Who'da thunk it? Not I. I'm a give-it-to-Vinnies, pass it onto friends, list it on freecycle, kinda gal. Remember the pram guy? Anyway, it's not that I'm completely altruistic, it's just that selling stuff requires great amounts of effort and I'm just the laziest person on earth. Giving stuff away is ...

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Parenting by heart | Some kids are just harder to parent than others

A psychologist told me that."Some kids are just harder to parent than others," she said and it seemed to make everything okay in an instant."Of course!" I thought. "There's nothing really wrong with my child - he's just harder to parent than a lot of other kids." I find this statement comforting, like a warm hand in mine. When it all gets so hard ...

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Parenting by heart | On the parenting rollercoaster

I over-think my children's life. I imagine scenarios happening that only a grown-up could possibly dream up. I worry about things they haven't even thought of yet. I see their world through eyes that look far beyond where they need. My brain has forgotten what it's like to be a child.My husband's philosophy is to only worry about something if the ...

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Parenting by heart | This is how back-to-school feels

When you've asked me 'what's for dinner' for the 17th time and it's not even lunch time yet, school can't come fast enough. My back hurts from bending to pick up the same pair of shoes that you've left all over the house all summer. I'd ask you to pick them up yourself for the 188th time, but even I'm sick of the sound of my own voice."Stop ...

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Parenting by heart | Soaking poo out of the underpants

To all the mums unpicking food scraps from the drains.Soaking wee out of sheets and feather doonas.Pulling the last two sheets of loo paper from yet another roll.You are not alone.To the mums wiping up the drips carried through the house from the garbage bag.Unclogging hairs from deep within the shower recess.Scraping Weet-bix off the dining room ...

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